|now_ish Some say I'm crazy for my love..
||[Nov. 13th, 2004|10:47 pm]
Spike left. He left. Deserved it! Bad dog was crossing too close to the lines..
"Shhh.." I whispered softly like a bird's last breath to my darling Miss Edith, nestling the doll within my arms as I laid back into the warm bed that was still laced with the scent of him. Of us. A pout came to my lips and I lifted my tiny companion so that I could study her face, seeing those tiny little eyes that were always watching.. always curious. ".. it's never happened, hmm? Yes, things will be right again. Melt away like smooth butter.." I felt disappointed. Angry. And my body was screaming. What could have been such a lovely filled night was torn and smashed! The feeling of tears threatened my eyes, dozens of bees stinging all at once upon them and I put Miss Edith back to her proper place among the mirror so that she could peer upon her pretty face.
Curious eyes. Lonely place.
Nippy little pixies like to lace my ears with such sweet lies. Those images, I remember, so pretty and filled with luscious screams that I could eat at all day. Yes, Daddy loved to play such wonderful games with me once a upon a time ago. But something was different, something burrowed itself within me and made me felt such nasty things! "I don't like it, Miss Edith," I murmured to her, my hands shaking as if trying to cling to the dying twig before the final leaf fell to the winter floor. "No.. it was unacceptable. But.. Spike! He was becoming so crossed." The taste of his blood still licking and attacking my tongue was still fresh and I was reminded of what have taken place. I frowned again when my face melted into my human mask and looked down upon my dress which was once again ruined.. those little wrinkles always made me feel so ill, little squirmy worms that refused to go away that is!
When I arrived in front of the dresser my ice gripping fingers curled around the dead wood to pull it open and reveal everything beautiful to me. I smoothed my hand over gently each gown, all smooth as milk, and I finally chose one. A dress of black lace with crimson trimmings.. mm, reminds me of a night full of blood and such naughty lust. My favorite! Which tonight was supposed to be..
I could feel my hollow heart sink into the gripping darkness. I missed him. I missed our good times. I missed the days where he'd break a single piece and offer Miss Edith half. "No more," a growl choked my throat, pulling the dress off from the hangers and letting the ruined one slide slowly off my body. ".. not until he decides to be a good boy again. A Princess will always need her knight. Like a knight always needs his Princess." Casually I slipped into my new dress which hung passed my feet, it's beauty upon me only measuring more and more to the wilted daisies I would plant to the garden with each button.
My hair was still brushed, lovely touches of paint still decorating my features. Maybe now I would look more acceptable in his eyes -- maybe without the messes I would remind him since I look like a Princess to him. Maybe now my eyes will draw in more..
A skip was led by my feet to the peering window where the boy still made play after all this time. It's still oh so very late. Mummy must be worried.. he must be brought home so he can have his bread. "Oh yeah.." I grinned so darkly with thorns tugging at my lips, ".. I'll bring little Hansel home." Since no one else will play games with me I must do it myself! Spike's lovely taste was teasing me and my tummy was oh so very hungry..
I was swimming in the air to where the boy awaited me, so quick and graceful I was to get there! He stood in the front just how I saw him and immediately cautious eyes flew upon me. Let me snatch them away those pretty little birds! "Mummy is waiting.." I told him, my voice always singing as children likes songs. Takes them to happy places. ".. it's so sad to keep her waiting, she is so very worried."
His eyes were blue. Like Spike's.. only difference they sang of angels. "You don't think I can see right through those eyes, Hansel?" I asked him as I watched my voice chill his veins. He was frightened.. a fear screaming that didn't need a voice to do so. The fun has already begun. "Come.. let's go together." I stretched my hand to him but he only shook his head. No words.. just a rattling head. My eyes narrowed and I moved forward only to have him move back.. keeping the distance long between us.
It made me giggle. I was the cat toying with the frightened little mouse. I'd always liked cats. Never thought to be one, however. It was fun. The only problem were the mouse's frightful eyes. Those eyes that kept hollering his name at me over and over again. So horrible, those eyes. Spike! They would yell. Spike! SPIKE! SPIKE! "ENOUGH!" I finally hollered at the fairie's voices in my brain and sprang forth at the child faster than he could react. I cradled his head with my arm wrapped around his neck, holding him tightly against me. My fingers spidered down toward his forehead. "Come now, little sweetie, you mustn't wiggle," I said in a singing voice. "Those eyes don't belong to you, noooo, they belong to the devil!"
Games. Must play. Musn't spoil. Hungry. Hungry. My teeth were gritting together through my fustration and I snapped my hands upon his shoulders so I could see the frail child in front of me. Little Hansel was frightened. Loved.. marvel in it, mmm, I'll swim in it with many fishes! "Shhh," I whispered, feeling myself growing more and more angry. I couldn't enjoy this.. those eyes.. nasty blue eyes! Ruins EVERYTHING.
A loud growl escaped my throat and without notice, my fingers were shoved into the eye socket's of Hansel and curled around so I could claw them out! When they were pulled free from his skull his eyes were connected to a single, sharp nail of mine.. and I postioned them in front of his face. He was SCREAMING, WAILING, and yet I found no enjoyment. Nothing. "Can you see me now?" I hissed as I wiggled the snake eyes only to finally dropping them both to the floor so I could snap his little neck. Those noises can become so tiring..
And it was because of Spike. Because it hurt.
Didn't like it when we were like this because it always ruin the fun. Always ruin the games.. he could be with me or away. I was feeling so crossed to the point tears approached again. I wiped the tears from my cheeks and sobbed in, my eyes star gazing to the streets that surrounded me. Black. Lonely. Lost. All and everything that was eating me at this moment because Princess couldn't even play her games.. and she wanted to play.
Wasn't before but now.. the Princess is lost without her knight.